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Toilet Repair
By Arthur Sneddon

It’s nine o’clock in the morning and you just don’t need this on your plate. The toilet’s all stopped up and you only just managed to get the kids off to school. Your husband said he’d see to it when he got back, but there was no way you were going to let him anywhere near it. The last plumbing job he took over required nearly the down payment on a new car for you to get fixed. So you call the toilet repair man instead.

That’s always the best way even though it might bruise his feelings to think that he might not have been able to do it. There was no way however that you were going to live in the same house with four males and only one bathroom. It was only a guess but you rather thought they went back to their grass roots mentality when taking a shower and only imagined they were under a waterfall, so messy was the whole place after they had finished showering.

That was neither here nor there really, you were still waiting for the toilet repair man to show up and now the baby was awake and crying. With your luck the toilet repair man would come three hours late and your whole schedule would be thrown off for the day. If you thought you had the time or the inclination, you would have looked into yourself instead of calling on the toilet repair man, but there was just no way you could get into it with a baby howling away on your hip.

And if you even thought that your husband wouldn’t mess up the job and leave you with even a bigger mess to handle you would have let him handle it, no two words about it. But after last time’s fiasco and the problems you had for weeks after that, you won’t even chance letting him anywhere near the toilet.

So now you sit and wait, making googly faces at your little bundle of screaming demands and cherub-like smiles. As usual the toilet repair man is late, but you’re still thankful that he’s even going to be able to make it over today. If it stayed until tomorrow there probably wouldn’t be anyway for you to stop your wanna-be handyman of a husband from having a go at fixing it.

Luckily for you the toilet repair man arrives and only two hours late instead of the expected three. He goes in and comes out within a few minutes holding a toy submarine in his hand and a beaming smile on his face. It’s my guess ma’am, he tells you in a serious voice, that the submarine was unable to navigate the U-bend.

Perhaps the little tyke might have better luck with it in the bathtub. There’s not much you can say to that so you only smile, nod weakly and stare at your one-and-a-something baby with bemusement. The toilet repair man had said it all.

Author Details:
Arthur Sneddon, copywriter for various websites including, The A to Z of Home Improvement, part of an ambitious project to cover various subjects.

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